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It's been a while since our last post. Nearly a month in fact.

Just thought I'd mention that.

Have a good day :D

Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner... and Other Stuff

Dave: So I'm watching '21' right now. It's pretty awesome actually. For those of you who haven't seen it, Jim Sturgess (some random) and Kevin Spacey (yeah, that guy) star in a 'based on a true' story of Geekery, Gambling and 6 MIT student's "Life Experience". So yeah, it wasn't bad. I'm not going to do a review of it, as there are much better people to do that (shout out to Kermode), but it gave a welcome break from revision, and an excuse for chocolate raisins!

Thomas: Mmm...chocolate raisins...like chocolate peanuts but with raisins...mmm...

*Ahem*

I've seen the film 21. I think. It's not a great film, it's not a bad film. It's one of those films that's completely forgettable. You'll forget you've seen it, not memorable in anyway really. Well except for that. It was good enough, entertaining for however long it was and I'd probably watch it again and then forget about it.

Wait, what film was it again?

Mark Kermode - The mode of choice



Have I seen 21?

Happy Face

Thomas: Guess who just got a ticket for the Heineken Cup Final tommorow?

That's right, me :)

Dave: Lol rugby
/Dave

*UPDATE* Thomas: It was awesome :)

And lol at Dave for not liking rugby. He's missing out.

The Return of WWR

Dave: And so we fan into flame the still glowing embers of WWR's past. Do you see the red streaks across to the East, as a new dawn approaches? Do you hear the birds begin to call, and the creatures slowly stirring? The night is gone. The wind has lifted, the sails are taut once again. A new chapter is ready to be written.
The page lies empty before us...

Thomas: "What's that coming over the hill? Is it a colla-blog? Is it a colla-blooooooooog?"

Yes, that's right! WeWhoRamble is back and better than ever! Well, actually, its not. It's not gonna be daily, it's probably not gonna be regular in anyway at all. But it'll be funnier for it. That's the plan at least.

To start us off, I think we'll have a classic Dave moan/rant about how much fun his Advanced Higher Maths exam was today. Dave...

Dave: Thanks Thomas, I'd like to take this opportunity to welcome back our devoted readers to WWR. We bowed to the public pressure, the petitions, protests and court injunctions and have returned from our mid-season 59 day hiatus. So we're back, and 'better than ever' (see, blind optimism lives on)!

So onto the matter in hand: very predictably my Advanced Higher Maths Final Exam was absolutely awful. Just terrible. By far the hardest paper I've ever sat, and by far the worst I've done in an exam...and yet...none of it matters. None.of.this.matters. School has served its purpose, I have my place at University come September, and any results from these examinations cannot change that.
Despite the best efforts of my parents and teachers, I have realised this fact (a little late admittedly), and so its fair to say that revision has gone firmly into 'Cruise Control'.
... And the world collectively says a massive: 'Who Cares!'

Still, that was three hours of my life that I'll never get back, spent in an assembly hall with a curious knocking noise, that really starts to bug you after a while. Also, this is a shout out to all female (and some of the more bizarre, male) invigilators.

**DO NOT WEAR HEELS AND WALK ABOUT WOODEN FLOORS OF THE HALL DURING AN EXAM.**

Nothing more annoying during a test in my opinion.

Eugh, rant/moan over.
I'm tired, but I don't want to sleep and sink back into this recurring nightmare: Giant isoceles triangles chase me through terrifying Argand Diagrams, where imaginary numbers surround me before I'm divided by zero and wake up screaming.*


Thomas: I dropped maths a few weeks ago. So I spent the day sleeping, playing games, and then went to glasgow for my brother's birthday meal. Fun day actually :)


*I'm not actually that sad, well not yet anyway. Four years of maths coming up..... *facepalm*

/Dave

All Things Must Pass...

Dave: And so, it comes to an end.
The music fades, the dancing stops.
The torrent reduces to but a drip.
The flames are gone, embers remain.

Thomas: Unfortunately, due to unforseen circumstances WeWhoRamble is taking an indefinite break, i.e. neither me nor Dave can be bothered with the blog anymore really. It's quite difficult to think of something witty and clever to write every 2 days and even though the blog is meant for rambles, we still want to uphold a certain standard and we can't really do that if we just write anything.

Dave: So instead of letting WWR die a slow and painful death, we wish to send it away into the setting sun through a great glorious, final collablog.

Farewell WWR, you were a good passer of time, but now your time has passed.

/Dave

Thomas: *sniff* Well said Dave, well said.

We might occasionally post on here though, just not every day. So stay on the lookout cos Dave is determined to make his prediction come true.

We'll be back.



Don't think of this as the end of the end. It's the end of the beginning...maybe...

3 in a row. Just like my press-ups record.

It's the third day of consecutive blogging for me and it's beginning to tell. I'm breaking out in sweats, got the shakes, I'm having hallucinations and all the while I'm thinking about what I'm going to write in my ALL IMPORTANT BLOG!

Clearly this is a lie. The blog is not important enough to devote my undivided attention to but its far too important to be sarcastic about it's importance.

So I promised you a proper ramble today and I shall duly deliver. I will say absolutely nothing of any sort of importance whatsoever and you will be left thinking "why did I read that?" and "I'm going to read it again and tell all my friends about it". Hopefully.

Unfortunately, having only been in this job for less than two months, I'm a rookie. An amateur rambler. I'm like a policeman on his first day on the beat, only it's my 52nd. As such you might think that you think that this website is not for you. But it is. It's for everyone, it's universal, fun for all the family (except the dog because dogs can't read. But you knew that already). Right now we have 6 followers and 1300 page views and I know that Dave and I only account for 2 of those followers and about 900 (a conservative estimate) of those page views. So I know somebody is going to read this. In fact, you are reading this. Which means I'm maybe not the amateur I think I am. Either that or you're really easily amused.

Anyway, I'm all rambled out but here's an exciting video of Obama's Elf.



Have fun with 3 in a row blogs Dave

A Day of Sport

Today was a day of sport for me. And by that I mean I did no sport whatsoever. In fact, I did the total opposite of sport and watched TV for literally most of my day. But at least I was watching sport, which surely counts as a sport, no?

First was Italy v France in the rugby, an exciting game in a completely unexciting way. 8-50 was the score and yet it was a bit of a bore. I made that rhyme up all by myself :)

Then was England v Scotland. We were robbed! That english guy who tackled Thom Evans when he was about to score is a tool. The thoughts of joy and delight that were moments away from becoming a reality were cruelly crushed by his timely intervention.

I hate to admit it really but...England deserved to win. I could of course be happy with the fact that England won cos I'm half-English, but the half-Scot inside me said he would leave if I did that. And he's the half that knows my pin code.

After that, it was the big finale. The crunch match. The decider. Wales v Ireland, the battle, and it was a battle, to see who would be crowned 6 Nations champions. Could Ireland win the Grand Slam for the first time since 1948? Or would Wales snatch Ireland's potential joy from them just as Ugo Monye had done to Thom Evans and the rest of Scotland earlier?

In short, because apparantly "rugby is rubbish" and "nobody likes rugby. Or you for that matter", the game was technically full of mistakes with only glimpses of good rubgy but it was more dramatic than when Dirty Dennis returned from the dead. Wales were 15-14 up, 3 minutes to go when O'Gara succeeds with a drop goal attempt. Then with the clock showing no time left, Wales get a penalty 58m away from the posts. Stephen Jones steps up and absolutely hammers the ball downfield but it falls 6 inches short and Ireland win their first Grand Slam in 60 years. The most tense thing I've ever seen, more twists and turns than B-boy Turbo's latest ever-changing story.

And if you don't like rugby, rugby doesn't like you.

Oh and Murray beat Federer :) But Middlesbrough lost :(

A proper ramble tomorrow I think. Then on Monday it'll be Dave again I think. Sorry about that. And then on Tuesday it'll be Dave again. And Wednesday. And I'm sure he'll put lots of effort into all his posts.

Thomas out

Dave. What is he good for?

It's a good question and to be honest, I've not got much of an answer for it. But let's make a list shall we? As revenge for him leaving me and the blog to fend for ourselves for a whole weekend. Disgraceful.

1. He does the blog with me. Most of the time.

2. He's good for...er...um...funny jokes? Nah, no one will believe that. He's good for losing prediction league I guess.

3. He's good for losing picture challenges too.

4. He's good for making lists about.

And that's all I got really. Although I suppose he's also good for complaining that all my blogs seem to have "an edge" against him and I'm constantly taunting him. But let's face it, he's away for the weekend and I'm left in sole control of the blog for 3 days. What did he think would happen?

This blog-on-a-bus was written whilst I was on a bus. Keep up, fellow ramblers. Honestly.

What's That Coming Over The Hill...

...is it the summer? Is it the summmeerrrrrrr!

"Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows everywhere..."

That's right, as Thomas observed yesterday: it's sunny in Scotland!!
I know what you're thinking,
'Two posts back-to-back, based on the weather? What a rubbish blog!' But seriously, today I was sunbathing...SUNBATHING IN MARCH IN SCOTLAND!

I <3 Global Warming

*Update* I just had a big paragraph in here about the basketball season, but then I accidentally deleted it. And I can't really be bothered typing it all up again. The jist was: basketball is fun, ooo its sunny etc. Oh and I'm away for the weekend so you'll be stuck, I mean privileged, with Thomas 'blogsitting' for the weekend.

Now, Thomas, I've left you pizza in the fridge and you can watch as much tv as you want. Just make sure that the blog gets tucked up into bed before midnight every day and I'll be back before you know it on Monday. If there's an emergency you can reach me on my mobile. Be good and remember, I'm Trusting you Thomas... Don't let me down.

Back on Monday!

/Dave

A Rare Occurrence

A rare occurrence you say!? What could it possibly be!?

I tell you what it is

IT WAS SUNNY TODAY!!! IN SCOTLAND!!!

Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, he's lying, sunny in scotland? Didn't Jean Paul Satre define that as the ultimate paradox on which our entire understanding of the world is based? What's going to happen now that it's happened? A black hole could open in the middle of Loch Ness at any moment! SUPERMAN! SAVE US!

*cough* Ahem.

Don't worry though, normality has resumed, the rain clouds are back for the decade and looking set to make everybody miserable once more.

And with that happy thought...over to you Dave



*UPDATE* I love Dunfermline :D Quite embarrasing for Aberdeen really, they can't beat a first division team at home. Hilarious.

Dave After Dentist

So I went to the Dentist today. And now I'll give you the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth... yeah I think I'm going to hold back from my stand-up career for now...

It was just a check-up and yet I still felt an element of trepidation, climbing the hard, grey, echoing staircase up towards the ultra pure-white door that seemed to grow larger and more menacing with every step. While simultaneously providing a barrier, the door also presented a chance to get far from that place, an opportunity to turn away from the house of pain. No-one had seen me yet, the door made me invisible to those torturers that dwelled behind it and I could just slip away unnoticed, and postpone the agony for another day, another week, year, lifetime.

I half-turned away...and as I glanced back, the pearl gateway seemed to mock me, to laugh at my inhibitions and scorned at my eagerness to flee.
And so, I breathed, deeply.
I faced the door and opened it, an expression of indifference and quiet boredom on my face as I was greeted at the reception:
"David, I presume?"
With barely any hesitation I replied
"Yes..."
And before I knew it, I was whisked into Dental Surgery Room 2, and was staring up at the peeling paper that covered the ceiling above...

The Dentist's Chair.

I thought I had enough time to compose myself, to sit in the waiting room, appearing to flick through a National Geographic while silently psyching myself up to face... what was to come.
I stole a glance at the table next to me, and immediately regretted it as all manner of needle sharp, murderous tools glinted back at me.
My stomach churned, and my hands grasped tightly, the arm-rests that tried to deceive you, presenting it as a place of comfort, not torture.

"Just tilt your head back for me David...a little more.. a little more...and to the right please.... good...now, nice and wide"

The horrible mini-vacuum sucks all the moisture from my mouth, as the dentist collects his deadly tools ready to begin his assault on my molars... I stare up into the bright yellow light that illuminates my mouth, and brace myself.

*90 seconds later*

"Everything seems to be fine David, we'll see you again in 6 months"

:O

...yeah I may have over-hyped it a little, so sue me.

Oh and the video is I think its fair to say an internet phenomenon with over 15 million views or something, called David after Dentist. My experience wasn't quite so funny as his.... oh well

/Dave

Dirty, Lying, Cheating...teachers

They tell you in primary school that teachers are faultless human beings, they can do no wrong. And you, as a small, extremely gullible child, believe this, at least to some extent and it carries through in your life for a while. It's not until you get into senior school that you begin to realise that teachers are actually human and that they have a life outside of school. "As if!", I hear you whippersnappers say, but it's true. And this little story exemplifies the point.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tees/7947127.stm

Basically, this teacher, one David Flinn, not only invented the death of his girlfriend to get sick leave to go to her funeral, he invented the death of two more! The article says, "Flinn told colleagues that his "girlfriends" had died of Aids, in a car crash and of an unspecified fate in America." What a lying swine!

Not content with just lying about having girlfriends in the first place and then saying they died, oh no, he also "came into school with a walking stick, telling colleagues he had been injured by a car during a hit-and-run incident." and "On another occasion, Flinn appeared at work with his arm bandaged, explaining to staff that he had been given an implant to control his adrenalin levels."! Really quite funny when you think about it. Reminds me of a boy in my year who also has a tendency to, shall we say, exaggerate the truth a little. To the point of lying. Now this "B-boy Turbo", as we shall call him, has claimed previously that his uncle has a ferrari. No wait, his dad's uncle. No wait, his dad's uncle's friend has one. No wait, his dad's uncle's friend's cousin's dog's brother's owner's mother's sister's boyfriend's other girlfriend's other boyfriend has one. Except it's not a ferrari, it's a fiat panda. You get the picture.

Anyway, this pathological liar that is B-boy Turbo is currently claiming that he has something wrong with his face. Passing the opportunity for an easy joke I asked him what it was. He said:

"NOBODY KNOWS! IT'S CRAZY! THE DOCTORS HAVE NO IDEA! I'M A SPECIAL CASE!"

Well at least he wasn't lying about one thing. Further questioning reveals that he apparantly gets facial spasms, is on heavy medication and has to visit the hospital regularly. Of course, he can't actually name any of the doctors that work at the hospital and he doesn't even know where the hospital is.

This may seem trivial to all you but I do have a point. See, this lead to the one of the all time great excuses that mankind has ever known and I would like to share it with you.

One day, I was organising a football game and we were one man short. So, out of desperation, I phoned B-boy Turbo. He said he couldn't play. I said why not. He said, and this is no word of a lie, it was because he was "off his face on drugs" (meaning prescription drugs). By this point I had turned the phone on speaker and all of the gathered people literally fell over from laughing at his ridiculous excuse which we knew for a fact was a lie. But, credit where credit is due, I didn't mind that it was a lie because it was just such a brilliant lie, told with utter sincerity, in the knowledge that all parties involved knew it was a lie. Completely brilliant.

I do feel sorry for both these people though. It's a sad state of affairs when somebody is reduced to coming up with extremely elaborate lies to get attention. Maybe one day B-boy Turbo will find happiness, possibly as an improv raconteur, who knows.

I do have other stories on the soon-to-be infamous B-boy Turbo and they may be shared in time, on another day, in another blog. So for now...

/Thomas

(Stolen from Dave)

Man-Flu

So...

I have man-flu. Not a cold, not the sniffles, not 'feeling a bit peaky' but some masculine man-flu. I'm also using man-tissues, man-paracetomal and some man-soothers.
Sigh, I really hate it when a cold gets to the point where you can't remember what it feels like to be well. Thankfully, that is not quite such a distant memory as yet, and I'm going to POWER THROUGH!... yeah.

In other news, I severely dislike 90210. Like, alot. Like, really alot. Haven't we had enough of so-called 'Teen Issues' shows like the 'One Tree Hill', 'Gossip Girl' and 'The O.C'? And the spoilt-kids-of-LA spot has already been filled by the insipid 'The Hills', has it not?
Sigh, maybe it's just me who can't appreciate the finer arts of watching shows revolving around the lives of elite socialite teenagers living in the nice parts of major cities in America.
But you know what show I AM enjoying?
'How I Met Your Mother' or HIMYM to us fans. Great show, some would say legend-wait for it-dary. (Please someone get that!). I'll go into it in more detail another time.

I've decided to re-read the Harry Potter books (a great idea in the lead-up to exams..), and to try playing the guitar obsessively again. Also, I'm nearly finished day 3 of my new chocolate-free life (well for the next week anyway), in a demonstration of my will-power and desire to keep all my original teeth* into later life.

Hmm, what else is happening in the world?
... I got nothing.
Oh well.
Until next time,

/Dave


*(Almost.. long story)

*Update* Thomas: It's not really a long story. Dave hit himself in the face with a kayak paddle and knocked his tooth out. He made up for it slightly though by using his war wound to curry sympathy with several women. Good man.

Internationally Rubbish

So today I finally went to see The International because I didn't manage to go last week cos I got to the cinema late. Silly me.

It's a difficult film to describe really. Clive "I'm British and I'm angry" Owen plays the main character, who's British and he's angry. He also has a history. Just read his file. The character he plays is Louis Salinger, an Interpol agent who has a a personal vendetta against a bank. Maybe they charged him an overdraft fee. So totally clichéd character then.

Next up is Naomi "I'm in the film because I'm blonde" Watts. Her character is a New York attorney or something, it's not really made clear and you don't really care to be honest. She's got a husband and a kid but you don't care about them either. In fact, you don't really care about anything she says or does in the film. Or ever. In life.

The film begins with two men in a car talking. They say some spy-like stuff, it's all very intruiging. Then one of them starts smoking a cigarette and offers one to the other guy. That did it for me. The film was ruined. I thought it would just be a succession of clichés with a nonsensical plot tying it all together. And it was.

One of the men then gets out of the car and starts walking away. He makes a quick phone call, reels off some espionage clichés and then has a heart attack.

OR DID HE!?

At first glance it appears to be a heart attack, the highly trained coroner even thinks so. But our favourite angry, "I breathe heavily through my nose" Interpol agent knows better and turns over the corpse of his dead friend to find a little hole in the back of his neck. Like the coroner wouldn't look at his back. Although apparantly he didn't.

Now I don't want to spoil the film too much for anyone who was thinking about going to see it but I do want to say this. Don't go and see it, it's rubbish. The characters are dull and predictable, the plot is dull, nosensical and predictable and the only good bit in the film is when they have a big shoot out in a museum. Admittedly it is a good shoot out though. Some good violence, which is always a plus.

1001 Word Apology

So my internet went down last night, router switched off then after that I couldn't connect to it (I blame the evil PCs that rule the world).
So sorry, and as a part of my apology a picture says a thousand words...


but this picture already has a word in it, so make that a thousand and one?

PS
Interesting observations I made at work today include:

1. Every week, at round about 9.30am, at least one person will fail to understand the 5 foot bright red sign above the alcoholic beverages indicating that we cannot sell alcohol before 11, the secondary sign to the right of the tills, the sign on the tills and will still come up with a 6 pack of Carlsberg and a bottle of High Commissioner, leaving me to try and explain.

2. Every week, someone ill-informed and politically unaware, will attempt to explain the Labour Government's role in the credit crunch... in the time it takes for the chip and pin machine to print out a receipt. I tell myself to 'Just smile and nod Dave, laugh occasionally and make agreeing sounds'... it normally works! Especially when they see me telling myself to do that.. you know, they walk away quite fast after that..

3. Every week, someone will personally accost me and inform me that its a penny cheaper in the petrol station 20 miles away, and that its daylight robbery what I'm charging... here's the thing, I don't set the prices.. and really couldn't care less.

4. Every week I wish that time would move forward at the same pace that it does in exams that matter, rather than the oooooooooonnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeee sssssseeeeecccccccoooooonnnnnnddddddd that I have at the petrol station, and vice versa.

5. I'm another day closer to Uni... :)

PPS
That's right! I ended the post on a positive note!!!! Veered away from the moans in a complete U-turn onto Positivity Street... it's a shame this street leads straight onto Moan Lane once again...

Until next time
/Dave

After the battle...

Scene: A battlefield. Dismembered bodies are lying everywhere, several man are clutching the bodies of their fallen comrades, weeping uncontrollably. The stench of death is everywhere. A harrowing fog veils the horizon. An extremely handsome general steps up and surveys the scene while a young private hurries up to him.

Private: Sir! Sir! The results are in!

General Thomas: Oh goody! How did we do?

Private: Well lets see...it says here that we got 2 results right and 1 score! That's 5 points to us!

General Thomas: By jove! That's jolly good! And what about the Evil Enemy?

Private: Dave got 2 results right.

General Thomas: Fantastic! A resounding victory!

Private: But there's more! It also says that Dave posted his predictions after all the games had kicked-off, rendering his predictions null and void!

General Thomas: And to think he thought he could win! Rather hilarious, if I do say so myself. So final league table then?

Private: It looks something like this (pulls out piece of paper with league on it)

Thomas 14

Dave 6

General Thomas: Jolly good! Pizza and punch in the penthouse, chaps?

Predictions

After yesterday, the league table looks like this

Thomas 9
Dave 6


THOMAS

Barcelona 3-0 Lyon, (agg 4-1)
FC Porto 1-1 Atletico Madrid, (agg 3-3)
Man Utd 2-0 Inter Milan, (agg 2-0)
Roma 1-2 Arsenal, (agg 1-3)

DAVE

Barcelona 2-0 Lyon (agg 3-1)
FC Porto 2-1 Atletico Madrid (agg 4-3)
Man Utd 3-1 Inter Milan (agg 3-1)
Roma 1-1 Arsenal (agg 1-2)

The Hoosiers and the Champions League

The title is because I'm worried about Dave. Like the song. See?

Laugh damn you!

Anyway, in all seriousness, what is Dave on about? The Dave Arena? Me being complimentary towards him in an "interview"? There even being an interviewer in the middle of an arena?

The craziest thing, of course, is that he thinks he can win. As if. I've built up an unassailable lead. It may only one point but it's unassailable because he just doesn't have the football knowledge to predict properly I'm afraid.

Also I think the lollipop man on the road near me hates me. He never stops the cars for me. He does it for everybody else but for me he just sits in his chair and sneers at me and chain smokes. I think he spat at me once as well.



PREDICTIONS

THOMAS

Bayern Munich 2-0 Sporting (agg 7-0)
Juventus 1-1 Chelsea (agg 1-2)
Liverpool 2-0 Real Madrid (agg 3-0)
Panathinaikos 3-2 Villarreal (agg 4-3)



DAVE

Bayern Munich 1-0 Sporting (agg 6-0)
Juventus 2-0 Chelsea (agg 2-1)
Liverpool 1-1 Real Madrid (agg 2-1)
Panthanaikos 1-1 Villarreal (agg 2-2, pens Villarreal to go through)

The Return of The Prediction League

*AN ELECTRIC ATMOSPHERE*
*SUDDENLY THE VOLUME LIFTS TO DEAFENING LEVELS*
*DAVE and thomas ENTER THE DAVE ARENA*
*FIREWORKS*
*APPLAUSE*
*Dave and Thomas acknowledge the crowd gathered at the Dave Arena and soak up the atmosphere ahead of this round 2 of the Prediction League*
*First, an interview with Thomas ahead of the upcoming fixtures:

Interviewer: So, Thomas two weeks ago you edged ahead of Dave in the WWR prediction league, do you feel you can keep that form going?

Thomas: Well, it's going to be tough against such an illustrious opponent even to come away with anything from this week's round and I just feel privileged to have got this far. Anything I gain from now is just a bonus.

Interviewer: But Thomas, you must think that you have a chance of overcoming Dave tomorrow evening?

Thomas: Sure, everyone has a chance, and it's always good for some of the lower Predictionists to get a chance to predict here at the home of Predictions, but really I'm just going to enjoy the day out and hope for the best. Maybe one day I'll be back here with some titles under my belt, and ready for a real shot against Dave who I really look up to and acknowle as the Master of Predictions.

Interviewer: Certainly a glowing recommendation by Thomas then Dave, how do you respond to his praise of your achievements?

Dave: *laughs* well some cynics might analyze Thomas' comments as some simple mind games, in an attempt to psyche me out, but I know Thomas and his type too well for that. I accept Thomas' comments with humility and also agree that one day in the future he could rise to this level, I just get the feeling that that day might be a little farther off than many commentators have speculated. There's no point in putting undue pressure on the lad, he's got a bright future ahead of him, perhaps in the lower leagues and while securing the win, I'll try and ensure that he isn't humiliated. No promises though eh Tommy? *laughs and digs Thomas in the ribs*

Interviewer: Well Dave, despite many calling this as a foregone conclusion, there still *laughs* remains the matter of overturning a one point deficit from the first round. What are your plans for tomorrow?

Dave: As you know, I like to keep my cards close to my chest but at the end of the day I think the class of my Predictions will show through. No disrespect to Thomas, he's done fantastically well to get to this stage, but I would be lying if I said that I could see him coming out on top. In terms of what went wrong in the first round, there were some surprising results, great for the fans of course, but they proved a little detrimental to my own point tally. I also was perhaps a little complacent and made some predictions without even checking out injury news *laughs*, those mistakes have been rectified and I'm confident of a big win tomorrow.

Interviewer: Thanks for your time Gentlemen.

Dave: Cheers, and Thomas *grins*... best of luck for tomorrow mate.

*Dave waves to the crowd who cheer madly*

*Thomas waves to the crowd.....

a single cough is heard amongst the sudden silence*

/Dave



Thomas: An interesting insight into the mind of the clearly mentally unhinged Dave there. Either that or he conducted the interview with a body double cos I'm never that modest or polite.

I'm going to laugh so much when I trash him in the predictions. So so much.

Also, Dave, you've got a spelling mistake in that post but I'm not gonna tell you where it is. Bwa ha ha!

5 weeks in

It's been about 5 weeks since we started WWR so I just thought I'd give a little update on how life has changed since then.

Not much.

I'm a teeny-weeny bit busier than I was before cos I've got stuff to write and I've got to make Dave write stuff.

And thanks to the new strings on my guitar, my fingers are much more bleeding. Such a cliche I know but it's not through too much playing, oh no. It's from when I was restringing it. The strings are really sharp at the end and I cut myself on them. Three times. Absolute joke.

Boro were knocked out of the cup today as well. I'm mentally preparing myself for life in the Championship. At least we might win a few games down there.

Here's a cool video. Just cos. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uw15zgMMq9M&feature=related

Don't you dare start a video challenge Dave.

Champs league predos tomoz methinkers. I'm in lead with 6 at the moment but Dave is right behind with 5. Stay tuned for the exciting finale.

Also, we need a forfeit for the loser. We have 6 followers and it's time you made yourselves useful!



And yes, I really did use the word teeny-weeny.

Collablog

Thomas: Today is Dave's day to blog so he had an idea.


Dave says (22:17):collab blog?


Typical.


On a side note, or actually a front note because this is quite a pointless point, which is what this blog is for, I think the words collab blog should be condensed to a new super word.


Collablog.


Agreed? Good.



Dave: It's true. The word 'collablog' is (patent pending) property of WWR inc.

WWR has also taken out a patent on the word 'and', symbols '&' and '+'.

....don't believe us? PROVE US WRONG!

Thomas: Update on facebook, I'm now 1st for "more likely to succeed", "rather hang out with for a day", "better listener", "more loyal", "more creative" and "more likely to do a favor for me". Great success.

Dave: I smell.

Dave (really): I really smell.

Dave: (really really): Thomas, you're ridiculously immature.

Thomas: I smell.

A True Ramble

"Let the words flow from your mind to your hands to your keyboard to the internet without thought for what you are saying" -extract from Way of the Rambler by Ira Mbler

It's a good book. Goes on a bit though.

So this'll be a quick one cos I'm going to go see The International in a minute. Yes, maybe I should wait until after I've seen it to blog, but unfortunately I'm solar powered and need to sleep at night.

I wish Lost would get Lost.

*tumbleweed*

I had a nice chat with an old man at a bus stop today. He's going to Hawaii in 2 weeks. He wants a tan and wants to see the telescopes at Mauna Kea. I told him I was going to be doing a physics degree and he said "I know" and got on the bus. Creepy.

1K hits and 6 followers

I would like to talk numbers for a moment if I may, 01010011011001010111001001101001011011110111010101110011011011
000111100100100000011010000110111101110111001000000111001101
1000010110010000100000011000010111001001100101001000000111
10010110111101110101

Right now, that's over with I have a small announcement to make...

I, Dave, being of sound mind and writing of my own free will...

...FREAKING LOVE LOST!!!
Oh my goodness, what an episode, from first to last, yet another masterpiece. However I cannot discuss the intricacies of the plot here, the many questions that remain, the answers that were tantalisingly dangled right in front of our faces, before being snatched away again leaving but a memory, a blurred image burned into our minds before a blinding white flash takes us back...or forward.

I wish not to spoil any Lost episode for any one of the WWR readers, and also don't wish to incur Thomas' wrath by lingering on the show any further.

So onto other news.
Today, it is snowing. I am fed up with snow. Roll on the summer!!! NOW!!!! Also I have nabs. Lots of nabs. I have one tomorrow. I need to start revising. And it's 23:56. So I guess that most of this blog was about Lost.... oh well!

Better post on Saturday, pinky promise.
Over to you Thomas...

Beach Boys and lol at Dave

**Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this blog post are sensible and well-informed and are in no way indictive of Dave's opinions**

"And if you're here for funnies, check the pic."

How about no? Because that particular challenge is over and I won. Dave clearly failed to post a funny picture in his post on Sunday, ergo (yes, ergo), I win. Challenge is over, no more funnies in this blog!

Here's what happened with my school when I said I wanted to drop some subjects:

Me: Can I drop 2 of my 3 subjects?

THEM!!!: Sure.

Me: Well now that you put it that way, I don't want to drop them! Have it your way!

THEM!!!: Whuh?

My school is just better. It's like that Beach Boys' song Be True to Your School. I'm being true to my school. Cos don't you know it's number 1 in the state...oh wait, no it isn't, it's falling to bits and is, by virtue of a council report, officially unfit for purpose. But the SNP have decided that education isn't that important really. Aren't they just great?

Middlesbrough lost 4-0 today :( but a quick glance at the run-in doesn't look too bad, some wins in crucial games and we can stay up but we've gotta do better.

Speaking of the Beach Boys, in my physics lesson the other day we were talking about waves and vibrations and stuff and everytime the teacher said the word "vibrations", the bit from Good Vibrations played in my head, "I'm picking up good vibrations". And it was said about 90 times. It's a good song but I'll be damned if it wasn't annoying.

What to blog about?

It's late and I've been wondering what to blog about... haven't come up with anything so I'll just let it flow and see what happens. I'll 'ramble', if you will.
(90% of you will now have browsed away)

So I tried to drop a subject at school today. They didn't let me.
Their reasons included:

1. Them: 'You just want less work because you've got 4 unconditionals'
Dave: '....point being?'

2. Them: 'By signing your name on your option form last April, You entered into an agreement to complete the subjects listed on it'
Dave: ' ... so no one in the entire year has changed even one subject during that time? I personally know at least 20 people who have.'
Them: '.... we are unaware of that.'
Dave: ' oh really?'

3. Them: 'Employers in the future are differentiating potential applicants by their ucas points, as people with First honours are 10-a-penny'
Dave: '...I'm sorry, can you repeat that last bit?'

4. Them: 'You already have 6 free periods, we're not giving you any more'
Dave: 'I'm not asking for any more, I'm just asking to do Practical PE, instead of a higher. (clearly not a skive... okay maybe a little).'

5. Them: 'You signed a different contract at the start of the year, stating that you would complete the courses to the best of your ability, and behave in a responsible manner'
Dave: 'HAH, I was off on that day, so didn't sign anything!!!!'
Them: 'Stop being pedantic'
Dave: 'what? In what way am I being pedantic, you're claiming I signed a contract that I didn't sign! In everyday life that's quite serious'
Them: 'That will be all David.'

Not happy, not happy at all.
And I think it's safe to say that my total effort will not be put into achieving this particular higher, so I guess my potential employers will just have to be content with my First Honours.

Roll on Uni'.

And yes, I know this blog isn't particularly funny, I just wanted to vent. Vent over. And if you're here for funnies, check the pic.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm eating a cake. Yum.

Anyway...

CORPUS CHRISTI HAVE OFFICIALLY BEEN DISQUALIFIED!!!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7919830.stm

I wanted Manchester to win anyway tbh. It seems every episode of this series I managed to catch by chance involved Manchester so I'm glad the trophy is now in the hands of the rightful owners.

In other news, Dave's picture wasn't a funny picture.

THEREFORE I WIN THE CHALLENGE!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSS!!!

In other other news, I think I've found a way to get my rankings up on facebook. Oh yes, that again. It's simple. Create 2 new facebook accounts and add me and the other account as friends on them. Then install the app and continuosly vote for me. Fool-proof.

In other other other news, I was at the Boro game on Saturday and it was awesome. Full stadium, great atmosphere, the crowd were singing crazy songs like "When the Reds go marching in", "Come on Boro" and everyones favourite "Boro Boro Boro Boro Boro Boro Boro Boro Boro!". Liverpool came at us on the attack but the back four held firm, especially Pogatetz and Wheater, the latter of whom was the subject of the song (to the tune of Sloop John B) "He's one of our own, he's one of our own, David Wheater, he's one of our own". Downing and O'Neil were outstanding on the counter attack, particularly Downing with his direct running down the flank.

Anyway, that was really boring just writing that, never mind reading that, so all you need to know is Boro won 2-0, we're staying up and it was a great game.

Have a great day, everybody

I finished eating my cake. :(

CORPUS CHRISTIE TRIMBLE!!!

Well I feel I should devote a post to the enigma that is Gail Trimble. Not because I can't think of anything to talk about... cough.... but because..ehm she's a very important... figure for the.. academic society that I pride myself on being a part of!

The Oxford student almost single-handedly won the 'University Challenge' for Corpus Christi College, winning 2/3rds of her team's total 1235 points.

Since then she has been catapulted into 'fame', has appeared on 'Breakfast', and has had many articles about her appearing in the British press. Mostly the aforementioned articles were full of praise for Miss Trimble, but some were a little disparaging towards the 26-year old, calling her a snob, and that she sneered her way through the quiz-show. Ehm, jealously much?

Personally, I think Gail did amazingly well, and agree with her new nickname of 'The Human Google'. But I think the best thing to come out of this whole affair, is (potentially my new message tone) the excited announcer shouting CORPUS CHRISTIE: TRIMBLE!!

It is inspiring to hear such enthusiasm for University Challenge, even from someone who is paid to watch it. Ringtone available here:
http://alibaabaa.co.uk/article/352

However, Gail could be left tarnished from this entire affair after this:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7917481.stm

Her team-mate Sam Kay had apparently graduated before appearing on the quiz show, and so the team could potentially be disqualified. So yay, for those who are jealous. And boo for the Human Google.

Still at least she had her 15 minutes of fame, and perhaps in the future it'll be GLASGOW: SMITH.... but with my Adv. Maths Prelim result I got last week, then perhaps not..

Also, today is St. David's Day and so I think it should be the law that everyone who is called David should receive a gift from everyone who is not. So gifts can be sent in the post... hint hint.

And for Thomas' information I'm NOT TIRED for this particular evening.

....I'm exhausted.

A Grand Day Out

If you'd asked me if I'd like to wake up at 07:00 on a saturday so I could spend 3 hours on trains and go see my team most likely get soundly beaten then I would probably say no. But that's almost what I did today.

I woke up at 7, spent 3 hours and 27 minutes on trains, but as for the game... :)

But before all that, something REALLY interesting happened today. I saw a duck tell a joke. Oh yes. There was a duck, standing in front of a load of other ducks, quacking away. Then it stops quacking and the other ducks just go mental! They all suddenly started flapping their wings and quacking madly! It was like duck stand up comedy.

And then there was the game. I was there, at the glorious Riverside Stadium along with 33,723 other, people, expecting, like 33,722 other people, to see Boro get thumped (my senile granddad thought boro were going to win 2-0. But he also thinks that John Major is still the Prime Minister so nobody really listened to him.) Anyway, Boro won, there was a great atmosphere at the ground and it were grey-ate (say in teeside accent). Full match report to follow on Monday.

The picture is dedicated to Dave, for obvious reasons. He might get annoyed eventually, but he won't get round to it for a while.

3rd Person...

Dave has decided to blog in the 3rd person today.
Dave is bored.
Dave is also tired.
Dave has decided to start a new line for each sentence.
Dave has also decided to start each line with his own name.
Dave doesn't agree that it is for vanity purposes.


Dave observes that today is Friday.
Dave also observes that Thomas used two pictures for the picture challenge yesterday.
Dave is, it would fair to say, displeased.
Dave requests that Thomas refrains from posting more than the conventional ONE picture.
Dave shakes his head at Thomas.
Dave also observes that Thomas' pictures yesterday were of a decidedly inferior quality in comparison to his own.
Dave also observes that the 'sharp sign' picture is probably older than the internet.


Dave heard Mr. T on Radio 1 today.
Dave pities the fool that doesn't like Mr. T.
Dave laments the face that he couldn't think of a better joke than that.
Dave also remarks that he is becoming increasingly drawn to Facebook, despite its extremely stupid privacy rules.
Dave also doesn't like the new style of bebo.
Dave also can't believe that he was beaten at Connect 4 today.... by a girl.


Dave wishes Tesco was nearer to his house.
Dave is tired.
Dave mentioned that before didn't he?
Dave wishes to reiterate the fact that he is tired.
Dave also dislikes patronising staff at his school.
Dave has work tomorrow.
Dave sighs.

Dave will only be doing this style of blog once.
Dave sighs again.

Dave wonders if Thomas posts on Yahoo Answers under the name of Razz?

A Great Many Things

As far as football is concerned, I never really get that much joy out of it. I support Hearts and Middlesbrough, so you can imagine why. Middlesbrough haven't won in 15 premier league games and are very close to being relegated this season. So yesterday was brilliant!

Firstly, Boro won 2-0, Downing scoring an absolutely superb, eat-your-heart-out-ronaldo free kick after 5 minutes of play. Dream start. Then Tuncay, who I used to nickname Goal-shy, hits a stunning volley to make it 2-0 on 20 minutes and the victory is assured from then on. You've just got to love the cup.

I, of course, watched all this on TV (though not on Sky). But I do have Virgin Media. Which has all the Sky channels. And I can watch all the Lost I want and all the football and all the movies I want. And Dave can't. Which makes it all the better.

As for predictions, the table stands at this:

Points
Thomas 6
Dave 5

So I'm in the lead. As I predicted. Do I get a point for that?

As for today, I had a 3 hour long maths prelim which I definitely failed. Hurray for unconditionals. Tomorrow, I'm off to teach a 6 year old genius who frequently beats me in arguments about quantum physics but doesn't know who James Bond is (he thought a James Bond was a type of bond between atoms. He said "I know what a single bond is and I know what a double bond is and even a triple bond, but what's a James Bond?"

Hilarious.

Where Is MY LAPTOP CHARGER!!!!????

So this will be rather a quick post, before my macbook decides to die, unless I can find the power cord in the next 5 minutes (by staring aimlessly around the room from my bed... I'm tired....and lazy).

As I type, matchday 2 of the Champions League knockout stage is underway, and things are going well prediction wise. Last night myself and Thomas both finished on 2 points each (3 points for a correct scoreline, 1 point for correct result (win/lose/draw) and 0 points for an incorrect result).

4% :O

Today, I realised once again that I have something missing in my life. There is a hole there, that cannot be filled, a vast chasm in my being:

SKY!!!

:(

I don't have Sky. Nevermind Sky+ or SkyHD.

This means, No Lost (except from online/itunes). Hardly any live football, and no movie channels. And yet they give me Sky Sports News, where I watch people watching Sky, I hear the noise of the crowd at the game, and the roars of excitement from Chris 'I-don't-believe-it-Jeff!' Kamara. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5T-ItZc8TA
It is a tease, a cinematic trailer, an advert for the beauty of bskyb... and I have fallen under its spell. I don't care that they only ever report on sport that is featured on Sky, that is practically every sporting event that matters anyway!
Sigh.

Freeview sucks tbh.

Any kind person willing to donate me Sky, please leave a comment!

1%

AAAHHHHHH

*UPDATE 1* I found my laptop charger

*UPDATE 2* you have to be kidding me Sky:
http://www.hotukdeals.com/item/344962/pizza-hut-bogof-for-sky-customers

School, what is it good for?

*Update* I almost forgot the picture! Shocking!

So today was MY first day back at school, after having an EIGHT day long holiday (that's one more day than Dave). And what did I do in the holidays? Well, I should have been revising for the prelim I found out I have to do on thursday. It really isn't fair, I was legitimately ill, I shouldn't have to do it. Like Dave said, I should be paraded about the school as a fine example to the younger kids, a paragon of academic excellence. Not forced to do exams! It's ridiculous! I have a legally binding contract with the fine establishment that is the University of Glasgow for me to study there, beginning on 14 September 2009 and I have no need for such things as "prelims". It can't even be used for appeal now anyway.

Added to this misery, today I had a totally stereotypical maths lesson. It solely involved the teacher writing lots of symbols on the board, talking about these symbols and then changing these symbols and then saying that these changed symbols proved that some other symbols were in fact the same as some other other symbols. Of course, I understood it, but i'll be damned if it didn't bore me to death.

Dave: Did you use a small tube like implement to pour a liquid onto a paper in small meaningful patterns?

Thomas: No. I used a pencil. Like the Russians did in that joke about Nasa.

Dave: Oh, ok.

Thomas: Unfortunately, I don't have as much opportunity for rebellion as Dave, as my school doesn't have a uniform and the PS2 in the common room has been smashed to pieces and is now nailled to the wall in the shape of the letters RIP. But they don't allow me to play kitten cannon in the library, which is a shame (http://www.addictinggames.com/kittencannon.html)


Time for predictions now methinks.

Tuesday
Arsenal 2-0 Roma
Atletico Madrid 0-1 FC Porto
Inter Milan 1-1 Man Utd
Lyon 0-2 Barcelona

Wednesday

Chelsea 1-0 Juventus
Real Madrid 1-1 Liverpool
Sporting Lisbon 0-3 Bayern Munich
Villarreal 2-0 Panathinaikos

Dave, if you would like to give yours.

Dave: Gladly Thomas, gladly...

Tuesday 24/2/09
Arsenal 3-0 Roma
Atletico Madrid 0-2 FC Porto
Inter Milan 1-1 Man United
Lyon 1-2 Barcelona

Wednesday 25/2/09
Chelsea 1-0 Juventus
Real Madrid 2-1 Liverpool
Sporting 1-1 Bayern Munich
Villarreal 3-1 Panathinaikos

Thomas: *Update* I also sent an email to my good friend Mark Zuckerberg suggesting that as Facebook is meant to be a site designed for the user, why not let the users of the site decide on the privacy policy? Seems like a good idea to me right?

The Trials of a Lazy Sixth Year

A better picture eh? You want to play Thomas? Then lets Play... >>>>>

So today was my first day back at school, after having a week long holiday. How much did I learn over the holiday? I learned that I don't do schoolwork in the holidays. At all. And even at the weekends it's pretty infrequent.

Unless it's set homework that will be graded, I inevitably just put it off and put it off, until I hurriedly knock something together in my free period on the first Monday back. What my school doesn't seem to understand is that, I have already achieved the academic awards that I needed from my 6 years at this establishment. They should be thankful! I am another positive number in their statistics, and surely that is worth something?

My being at the school, should be a bonus and privilege for them, by boosting their 6th year attendance figures and providing a *snigger* positive influence and example for my younger peers.

Sure they might disapprove of my disregard for normal uniform protocol, and of my flouting of the unwritten 'Thou shalt not play the Nintendo 64 loudly in the social area whilst your peers are learning' rule, but it is important to remember that I am merely preparing for student life!

One of the main purposes of 6th year is to prepare you for life in Higher Education is it not? They acknowledge this, but offer so called 'Life Skills' such as cookery and sewing, instead of beneficial training in things such as 'how long can you stay in bed before getting up for a nine am lecture?' or 'how to get extensions on essays due in last week', those classes, I would have taken.

Unfortunately I don't think I could live with myself if I took a course entitled "Sew Far Sew Good"...sigh, and so I have taken the opportunity of the free period (or the so called 'non-contact study period').

And yet, they still complain! Should I be punished for not submitting myself to the tyrannical regime that exists in the Home Economics department? If I did take up cookery as a life skill, I fear that I would be one ill-advised-washing-up-liquid-cake-prank, from possible detention or even exclusion!

Almost daily, I am lambasted by 'Principal Teachers', lamenting my 'poor time management skills' or my apparent indifference to the Prefect's authority. Well excuse Me! Sometimes the drive through in McDonald's is busy, and a shiny badge and blazer does not make you better than me at this school.

Still, just a few months and I can vent my frustrations on muck-up day before leaving this 'hallowed place of learning' to pastures new.

University, you are calling me, and very soon I will answer that call... But not quite yet. Sigh.

/Dave out

P.S. Prediction league starts tomorrow, with the Champions League knockout stages.

CHALLENGE!

Dave said yesterday that his picture was better than mine. I see this as a challenge. So here's an even better picture than his.




I can imagine this going on for a while.

Anyway, I'm not sure I have too much to say today to be honest. Except to say that I've not got much to say, which is saying something, but not much.

I did have this conversation with my brother James earlier though:

James: Hey, you know what sucks?

Thomas: Vacuum cleaners?

James: Hey, you know what suck in a metaphorical sense?

Thomas: Black holes?

James: Hey, you know what just isn't cool?

Thomas: Lava?

That's when he gave up. Win.

It's Another Work Rant From DAVE

Here's a funnier picture that Thomas' yesterday.

Top 5 things I hate About Work:

1. Customers talking on their mobiles while I'm serving them, while mouthing instructions and trying to use sign language with one hand.
2. Customers who talk down to me, especially this one guy who claimed that I shortchanged him for the Telegraph. (1. I didn't ((the price had been changed on it)) and 2. He was driving an Aston Martin Vanquish!)
3. Customers who mumble incoherently then SHOUT LIKE I'M DEAF
4. Customers in General
5. Going to work an 8 hour shift having had a total of 3 hours sleep

Still, it's good money.

I'm going to fix the horror show that Thomas has turned this background into, soon.

Prediction league coming soon...
Starting on Tuesday with the Champions League knock-out stage.

Also, how AMAZING WAS LOST?!!!!
Definitely back to its best with "316", the episode was simply superb.
I'm very interested as to where the Ajira Airways flight went... the flashback/forward from a while ago showing the camp with Ajira Airways water bottles etc on the beach is rather intriguing but I'll leave the debating to this site: http://darkufo.blogspot.com/

Go there, visit it, NOW!

Also Thomas, start watching Lost again, come on!

So yeah, work was fun. I'm still tired. I want sleep. Want Sleep. Wa' Sleh. W' S'. ---. zzzzzzz

/Dave

The Titleless Post

Ha! Irony!

Here's a funny picture. Just cos.

Has anyone else noticed how gay that picture is on Dave's tuesday post?

I've got an update about facebook!

Someone voted me more reliable than somebody else! YAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSS!!!

Although...it's a lot less fulfilling than you'd think it would be. I need more victories...

Dave mentioned he was in Glasgow yesterday. This made me think, what is so good about Glasgow? So I made a list, as anybody with too much spare time would.

1. It's got Primark
2. It's got another Primark
3. It's got Glasgow Uni in it.
4. It's near Edinburgh
5. Hampden Park

Then there's the negatives

1. Primark uses sweat shop workers
2. Neds in shell suits.
3. Not Edinburgh
4. Rangers
5. Celtic
6. Not got the Edinburgh festival
7. Weegies. They're everywhere.

Of course, Edinburgh is better. And here's why.

1. I live there
2. Edinburgh festival
3. Hearts FC
4. We're getting trams
Dave edit: O RLY? http://tinyurl.com/dkmx2j
5. The history
6.The culture
7. I live there

And for the negatives

1. Hibs

A comprehensive victory if I ever saw one.

Thanks to Moz for the idea

Also, at the risk of annoying Dave, here's an interesting link for you all
***LINK REMOVED, WWR DOES NOT TOLERATE THE DISCUSSION OF THE FORBIDDEN TOPIC***

http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/blog/2009/feb/20/joy-of-six-classic-assists

Shush, don't tell Dave about it.

*UPDATE* If you look on the right of the blog, you will now see pacman, free for you all to play! How cool is that?

Thursday...Yeah

So, today was Thursday. Yep. I went to Glasgow. Uh-huh. T'was fun. mhmm.

I discovered that I cannot play pool whilst wearing glasses (although some would argue that I cannot play at all), it's just impossible to see both the cue ball and the ball I'm trying to hit at the same time as my glasses slip down... so I got mauled 13-6.

I also don't like it when people with a cold sit next to you on the train. And sneeze. ALOT. I hope that person didn't have Bird Flu, or smallpox, or the Black Death. Or this blog may be one person less pretty shortly.

Also I'm tired. Very Tired.

Dave

This post contains 0% f**tball.

Lies, Slander and Victory!

Thomas: After Dave's slanderous tirade against me yesterday, I had a thought. That thought turned into an idea, an idea which became a...a...what's that word for you have a really good idea again?

A brainwave, that's it!

I was studying Dave's blog and I realised something. We have no format, no pattern. Now you may think that it's a good thing because you never know what to expect when you read the blog. But it also means we never know what we're going to write. SO we've come up with a cunning plan to solve all this. We're gonna write some stuff at the start, which will then lead into some other stuff in the middle and it'll finish with some stuff at the end.

ALSO

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/7896309.stm

Take that Dave! That's victory for me!

Dave: Well no Thomas, it sounds more like the founders of Facebook took my grievances on board and are endeavouring to improve their website. Please elaborate on the nature of your 'victory'.

Thomas: See, what happened was, I sent an e-mail to Mark Zuckerberg and then he saw the error of his ways and changed the terms of service back. Yeah, me and Mark go way back, he knows pretty much everything about me, especially as he OWNS ALL OF MY PRIVATE INFORMATION!

Anyway, expect a collab blog soon!

Ooh and I'd also like to mention that I've started doing some abstract painting recently. Extremely abstract actually. No brush, no paint, no canvas, I just think about it.

Facistbook and the Dons Go Marching On

Recession fun fact of the day:

The total debt of the United States now exceeds the GNP of the entire world.
So slightly worrying...

After Thomas' praises yesterday of Facebook, I did a little research into that 'gem of a site' and uncovered some disturbing things in it's Terms of Service.
http://consumerist.com/5150175/facebooks-new-terms-of-service-we-can-do-anything-we-want-with-your-content-forever


Thomas: I didn't praise facebook. I said that app annoyed me a lot. Not quite praise in my book but...

Dave: You told me to get Facebook, which you already have, thereby recommending it to me, ergo PRAISE

There's some fun reading in there, such as

"Now, anything you upload to Facebook can be used by Facebook in any way they deem fit, forever, no matter what you do later.* Want to close your account? Good for you, but Facebook still has the right to do whatever it wants with your old content. They can even sublicense it if they want."

Great news Facebook, do you want my soul while you're at it? So any original content that you upload to Facebook...becomes their property and you relinquish all rights to it??!! Think I'll stick with Bebo if it's all the same to you Mr. Facebook.

UPDATE: Click this for more Facebook 1984ness
http://tinyurl.com/38u2rf

UPDATE 2: And some more to feed your paranoia:
http://tinyurl.com/dducv9

On the Aberdeen front, I think it's fair to say that we romped to victory over East Fife with an easy 5-0 win. Five-star Aberdeen the headline could be, and it is amazing to me that we amassed such a winning margin without the injured Mackie! Goals from Wright, Aluko, Vidal and a late double from Chris 'bebo'* Maguire secured a vital victory for the Dons on the road to Hampden.

Thomas: I can't believe East Fife lost. What a cupset.

Dave: So my prediction of a cup final for Aberdeen is still on course, watch this space...

Until next time,
Dave

*see this for the reason behind his nickname: http://tinyurl.com/2nfnux

Just why?

Well it's a new day, I'm up bright and early, or still up I should say. But I have something to say. A few things actually.

Firstly, what went wrong with the blog? For me, it came up with a blank page, apart from the stuff at the side, including adverts. Then when I posted, the posts re-appeared but other things decided to disappear. Frustrations boiled and caused me to make 2 updates to the post! THEN Dave deleted it and gave me a link to a solution that would only excarbate the problem (Ironically the page he linked to crashed my browser and made me have to restart my browser)

Secondly, Dave cheated in some of his predictions. He predicts he will go to glasgow uni. He has already accepted an unconditional for it! That's not a prediction! That's an informed statement based on prior knowledge of what will definitely happen. It's not a prediction. He is deducted 10 points for cheating.

Thirdly, I like that acronym. WWR. Makes it sound like a war. Or a wrestling federation.

Fourthly, Facebook. I recently discovered the "compare people" app on it due to loads of people having installed it. So I'm coaxed into installing it. It turns out that apparantly 5 people said they would date me. Yay I think. But then I look at how many people said they wouldn't. Are you ready for this?

I don't think you are. Just to warn you, I will be using capital letters.

FOUR HUNDRED!!! (and exclamation marks)

Four hundred people! I'm forced to ask, how!? I don't even have that many facebook friends and it's meant to be an app to compare your friends! At least 5 said they would.

This app also compares you to other people, mind you. It does so by making you vote between two people on a question like who is cooler or who is smarter and then making you do this for lots of people and lots of questions. Then you can look at your rank in these things.

Sadly I'm not first for anything. Best is 4th among my friends for "Who would you rather hang out with for a day" with 6 votes and 4 wins from those. Shockingly I'm 5th for "who studies harder" with 4 votes and 3 wins despite the fact that I have literally not studied one tiny bit this year. Obviously this is a flawed app.

Although I did get 2 wins from 2 votes for "who is hotter". Which obviously makes it more reputable.

If you have facebook and you know me, get that app and vote for me!

Dave, get facebook and vote for me...please?

Fifthly, how boring was that Old Firm game? And how amazingly accurate was my prediction? Oh yeah.

I Predict A Riot

:O

Thomas: "So it's half 11 and Dave hasn't posted anything..."

Dave: I was merely preparing myself mentally and physically for the serious task of pouring my thoughts and feelings out into the internets! How dare you Thomas :@. Oh and I blame your blog problems on your crappy PC. Visit this http://tinyurl.com/kv2f6 to fix it.

So predictions and such like:

1. 'Boro will have another uninteresting season where they will escape relegation with about two games to go, guranteeing another team in the top flight with no fans and boring football.

2. George Burley will mastermind plucky Scotland to a shock victory in the Amsterdam Arena... before losing in a friendly to Iran the following month and being sacked.Jimmy Calderwood will manage to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory once again, by getting us to a cup final but still losing to a first division team.
(We will of course regain 3rd place, that's more of a given).

3. Romanov won't pay the Hearts' players wages again, claiming an error of some sort, probably by the SFA/SPL who of course are on a 'witch-hunt against his club'.

4. Celtic will romp to another title.

5. Ally McCoist will be installed as Rangers manager.

6. Man United will win the league/Champions League.

7. I will go to Glasgow Uni.

8. Summer won't be sunny.

9. Mackie will score 20 goals+ this season. (check his goal here from Saturday ooft http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/scotland/7891657.stm ((I would stop watching after a minute though))

10. LOST WILL BE AMAZING. /END (I'll go into detail about why it's awesome on Thursday)

11. Obama will change....something? The channel on his tv maybe?

12. WeWhoRamble - or WWR - will still be going into 2010

So that's my predictions, hope they come true aside from the Dons cup final and summer not being sunny.

Also, next week will be the start of the WWR prediction league, me and Thomas will predict scores for all the Premiership/SPL games. Usual format: 3 points for correct scoreline, 1 point for correct outcome, 0 for getting everything wrong. Loser at the end of the season will have to do some kind of forfeit undecided as yet...

Until next time:

/Dave Out

Another 8 minutes to spare :)

Inspiration

Unlike Dave, who was moaning to me yesterday about being devoid of inspiration, I am un-devoid of inspiration! Un-bereft of the stuff! It fills my coat pockets and my shoes, my desk is covered by jars of the stuff, waiting to be spread upon a blog post like the jam I had this afternoon on my golden brown toast, waiting to be sprayed upon the blog like the perfume I used this morning...I mean deodorant of course...

Ok, enough exaggeration and over-description and superb hyperbole. See what I did there?

Anyway, my idea is this:

PREDICTIONS!

Oh yes. Predictions.

Not just football or sport or anything, just general predictions about life, the world, martians etc.

So I'll start with the essential first, the base predictions.

Martians won't invade in the next 3-6 months. I guarantee that.

The world won't explode either.

Now that's the important predictions out of the way, onto the funnier ones.

Middlesbrough WILL avoid relegation! Bold statement I know but we'll pull through. We'll be out of the relegation zone with 1 win. If we ever win that is...

Man Utd will win the title, can't see Ruffled Rafa or Crazy Chelsea winning it now.

Celtic will win the title that matters but will draw 0-0 with Rangers tommorow.

Hearts for 3rd place, Dundee Utd have no hope.

Speaking of no-hopers, I believe Dave's beloved Dons were given a lesson in football today by the mighty Jambos. Not even the "brilliant" Mackie could do anything to stop the crushing defeat. I would feel sorry for the Dons but I don't like them :)

I will also win my league on Xpert Eleven. For the 4th season in a row :D (http://www.xperteleven.com/ if you don't know what it is)

On to politics, I don't like the Tories and I never will. That's because they are wrong about most things. I, on the other hand, am right about everything. Gordon Brown ain't perfect either but the thought of David Cameron running the country should cause children across the land to have horrible nightmares. I know I have them.

So there you have some basic predictions. I expect Dave to have some tomorrow as well, although I predict he won't. But if he does, it better not be about Lost. Let's face it, the writers have no plan for that show whatsoever, it's a prime example of what happens when you "just run" with an idea. Good at first but loses it's direction very quickly.

Unfortunately, the prediction of most of the people I know came true. I didn't get any Valentine's day cards :(

But I predict next year will be different! Even if I have to make it myself!

It's FRIDAY!!!!

That's right, I know my days of the week! Maybe one day I'll manage the magic of the shoelaces!!

In other news, it's near on a year from the day that Aberdeen shocked the world of football by (nearly) BEATING Bayern Munich.

It was a great day, freezing mind, but a really fantastic day. I was behind the goal to see goals from Josh Walker and Sone Aluko fly into the back of the net. Absolutely Fantastic, one of the finest hours in my support of Aberdeen.

Enjoy the video below. (and the pic up above is mine :) )




So that's what was interesting for me this Friday the 13th (ooo) of February.


Yes I know that I'm basically just recounting history of a year ago, and that it has nothing to do with current events... Well watch the latest episode of Hustle on the iplayer (It's great :-D)

The Day Today

Big news today. I was a hit by a car.

Yeah.

Well, not really, that's just what I told my physics teacher when she asked me why I wasn't in the lesson today. I was on my way to the common room to see if there was anyone there before I went to the music department for my first rehearsal as jazz band leader (which I was elected to against my will) and I bumped into her in the corridor. I think she bought it anyway, so it's all good.

As for the jazz band rehearsal, 3 people turned up, including me. I believe that it what is known in intellectual circles as an epic fail.

After jazz band, I was asked if I wanted to go down to my old primary school to do some investigation with solar cells with the P7s there as one of the people who was meant to go was ill.

I did not.

Fortunately I had a driving lesson booked for the same time as I was meant to go so I couldn't go. What a shame.

Unfortunately, that was the time my driving instructor called to say the lesson was cancelled because of the snow. And the other person overheard this. Just my luck.

Disturbingly, I found that a picture of me holding a football trophy and grinning like a dog that's just marked its territory on some poor, unsuspecting fool, is still hanging up in the school. In two places. It wasn't hanging up when I was there. Extremely odd.

I did get a panini on the way back from the school though, so it wasn't all bad.

In other news, England lost. Ha.

Writer's Block...Oh wait, thanks Chelsea

Dave: Sooooooo...

Something to say...

Anything...

Anything at all...

*tumbleweed*

Right here's something. Guus Hiddink. New manager of Russia, oh wait Chelsea, nope actually Russia... wait both? What??? Okay, so this guy is going to be the manager of Chelsea, in London AND the manager of a country 2000 miles away???

How is he supposed to keep an eye on his players AND keep an eye on the Russian hitmen that will be stalking his every step after one draw against a mid-table side???

I do not envy him.

...Although he is getting a double salary, for pretty much doing the same job. Working for a rich Russian guy, and trying to make a team of fairly average players (with a couple exceptional ones) into world beaters!

Good luck to him.



*UPDATE: Yeah it's a pretty poor post, so what, I'm tired :-(*

Breaking news

Thomas: I hereby announce the annulment of this blog partnership with Dave due to unreasonable behaviour on his part.

I didn't want this but I'm afraid the blog has become unworkable due to Dave's insidious comments against the real sport.

Kidding.

But seriously, rugby is good. And if you don't like it then... *sticks tongue out at non-believers*


Hiddink to Chelski? Didn't see that one coming from a hundred miles away, since before Scolari was even hired...

*sigh*

Chelsea have fallen into the all-too inevitable trap of dictatorial chairmen.


It goes like this.

Moneybags comes in, buys club. Fans go "Yay!"

Mr S. Daddy then acts as a spreader-of-the-wealth funding a spending spree equivalent to the GDP of a small country. Like Belgium.

Team immediately starts doing well, challenging for honours etc. Fans still saying "Yay!"

Team reaches final of several competitions. "Yay!" scream the fans. "Yay!" screams the chairman even. £4bn well spent he thinks.

Team loses in one or more finals. Some fans continue saying "Yay!" cos it's fun to say. Others bay for blood. Chairman goes on rampage, hires mercenaries to kill manager, calls them off at last moment and sacks him instead. Even though the team may have won many other competitions.

Richard Richardson then gets hires new mananger, who he immediately doesn't like and sacks after he comes within a post's width of great success.

By now A-billionbillioninthebank-ovich has lost loads of money cos he's a crook and he's now lost interest in the club. He starts sacking people on a whim. Some think he enjoys paying millions of pounds in compensation. Other fans say "Yay! Our chairman is insane". Most of these fans are sarcastic. Some are stupid.

Theres a term for this sort of thing I believe.

MADNESS

I'd rather have Steve Gibson as chairman any day.

HA!


As for poor Mr Adams...

He's a rubbish manager, worse than Southgate even tbh. Pompey were right to sack him.

Scolari Sacked!..and a True Don

Dave: "Luiz Felipe Scolari's Chelsea reign ended today after Chelsea sacked 'Big Phil' with immediate effect. The Brazilian had only been in charge since June but has been dismissed after an indifferent run of results left the Blues fourth in the Premier League table."

Hmm, I'm a little indifferent to this news myself, despite the fact that one of the biggest clubs in the world has sacked their manager.. while still having the possibility of winning the treble.

I'm much more enthused by the 'News from the North' that Aberdeen striker Darren Mackie has signed a 3 year extension to his current contract! Darren 'the Dazzler' Mackie is (to some) a legend at Pittodrie, being the club's all time leading scorer in the SPL, and having scored a number of key goals, such as his 50th for Aberdeen in the Uefa Cup tie against Dnipro last season. This netted Aberdeen a financial windfall and kick started an amazing Euro campaign that saw the Dons take on European giants Bayern Munich in the last 32. Just last season Mackie broke Rangers' hearts on the last day of the season, striking the second of two Aberdeen goals in a crushing victory against...them. He also scored the winner at Celtic Park, in the Scottish Cup quarter-final replay which sent holders Celtic crashing out.... before Aberdeen took on *deleted* in the-game-that-will-not-be-mentioned... EVER.

Moving swiftly on, in addition to these important goals, Mackie scored one of the most bizarre goals in world football. It is something that has to be seen to be believed. Luckily, it's on youtube! (See video below).




However, despite all these positives...
the forward has been plagued by injuries and inconsistencies, and some fans have expressed their displeasure at Willie Miller for offering Mackie this contract. They see it as a sign of the lack of ambition at AFC and as an unjustified reward for an 'average' player.

I on the other hand, welcome this move to repay Mackie's 10 years of service to the club, and reckon that his partnership upfront with Lee Miller will bear fruit this season ...or the next.

Chances are you, the reader, will have absolutely no idea who or what I'm talking about and will care even less than I do about rugby..but I care. :-) Well done Darren, here's to you *tips cap*.

Mackie versus Rangers - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WAXh0vVxekU

Mackie versus Dnipro - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FY45KyYMg8o

Mackie versus Celtic - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWgfWPI-iSs


And I make it to the deadline by 6 minutes! Woop

Sunday

Thomas: Today was the kick off for Scotland's 6 Nations campaign and we got all the luck with having to play the reigning champions first. We were expected to possibly put up a good fight but ultimately lose.

What actually happened was this.

We were rubbish. Dire. Crap. Terrible. Awful. Totally and utterly shambolic. The only semblance of hope we can take from that game was that maybe in one game in the future the other team will think we've got no hope of winning and then they'll stop playing after a while and we can sneak a win.

We can't even cheat properly! Two of our players tried illegal tackles and both were knocked unconcious as a result! One was stretchered off and the other was physically sick! What a shambles!

We almost made up for it at the end but Paterson couldn't keep his hands on the ball at the crucial moment. If that had been a try I could have seen us putting another one past the welsh but it wasn't to be and it certainly wouldn't have been deserved.

At least we've got an easy game next. Against France. Away.

*sigh*

Maybe one day one of the teams I support in a sport will actually win something. Until then, I'll be the sad and cynical one in the corner berating people and weeping periodically.



Dave: lol at rugby

Eugh

Dave: A Thought Time Line of My Saturday 8 Hour Shift


6.30am:
Alarm Goes - eugh

7.30am:
Work starts - eugh

7.32am:
I glance at the clock for the first time - eugh

7.34am:
Second glance at the clock - eugh

7.34am:
Am convinced the clock is broken - eugh

7.35am:
Nope - eugh

9.00am:
Promise myself that the minute I get off work, I'm going to bed - eugh

10.00am:
Wonder why I was up 'till 1am - eugh

11.00am:
Break time - :)

11.01am:
Every customer in Scotland simultaneously walks into the petrol station

11.02am:
End of break - eugh

11.30am
Half way through - :)
4 hours to go - eugh

12.00pm
Realise I haven't actually done any work - eugh

1.30pm
Congratulate myself at not looking at the clock for 90 minutes - :)

12.30pm
Realise I read the clock wrong - eugh

1.30pm
Lunch - :)

1.45pm
Finished lunch... still hungry - eugh

2.30pm
My boss finds more jobs for me to do - eugh

3.00pm
30 mins to go - :)

3.01pm
29 mins to go - :)

3.02pm
...oh come on - eugh

3.27pm
:O 3 minutes!

3.30pm
Boss finds me "just one more thing before you go"

3.50pm
:|

3.52pm
End of work

4.00pm
Sleep

:)

Dave


...
4.03pm
Insomnia

4.04pm
/facepalm

Today

Thomas: Today in my life. What happened today? Well, I was on prelim leave so I didn't have to go to school.

So I went to school.

Had a physics lesson, was a bit boring.

Had a guitar lesson, was a bit boring.

Played football, was a bit boring.

Played fifa at mates house, won 7-1 but was a bit boring.

So today was a bit boring. But this is the first time I've blogged from my phone so it's not all bad :D Life's been a bit boring now tbh, not much to do, most other ppl are working hard at school and I'm just bored all the time there. I need a game to play in school, that's what I need. Any suggestions?

I-ntensely T-errible V-iewing

Dave: Not to be outdone by the Comcast coverage of the Superbowl, ITV decided to have a laugh with almost the whole of England.

Everton were hosting Liverpool Wednesday for their 4th Round FA Cup replay. After almost 3 and a half hours of football (including the draw at Anfield about 10 days ago) the two teams were still even, and seemingly headed for penalty kicks. But two minutes from time youngster Dan Gosling scored the winner to send the Toffees on and the Reds out of the cup. Too bad nobody in England saw it.

It really is amazing timing. Almost two hours of football on Wednesday and ITV manages to pick the only moments to muck things up. Again, this is about 12-and-a-half minutes into the second period of extra time (so maths: after 117:30 of 120 minutes).

There I am, wandering what is going on after 30 seconds of adverts before the commentator's voice explodes into my earphones and the picture returns: "A Masterstroke. Finish of a seasoned veteran! A special goal for Dan Gosling!".... :O

So that is what bothered me this 5th of February 2009... although really it happened last night so...
ach never mind.
Here's the video:




Thomas: I watched it on Setanta :)

Something mildly amusing

Thomas: So, this blog has been going for a few days now and I still always get the urge to say "so,"and then (attempt to) say something mildly amusing before moving on to a proper point. Problem is I rarely have a proper point.

But to move onto my proper point, I'm in a bad mood. It's not even been a week and I'm already talking about nothing. I'm just rambling!

Dave: That's the point. If you look at the name, the clues are there...

Thomas: Oh.

Never mind then.

I do have something to say though. Apparantly my physics teacher expects me to continue going to my A-level class during prelim leave. This is a disgrace! An outrage! But I don't mind really, there's not much to do right now anyway cos everyone else has exams.

But on principles I'm annoyed. And that's what should count.

Law and Orshavin

Dave: And so it came to pass that on the third day of the second month of the year two-thousand-and-nine, that Dave submitted unto to the mighty Blogosphere; an offering of some words, arranged into sentences, to please the Blogosphere and to render unto it the glory that it deserved.

So, t'internet, sup?

Today, was a remarkable day in many ways.
Firstly, Iran launched their first satellite built domestically, highlighting their capabilities to launch a nuclear strike and presumably kill us all.
Secondly, the snow storms continued to blast Britain (actually mostly London, that's why its big news), causing 'Travel Chaos' and 'Wide Disruption' to apparently everywhere there were news cameras.
But the most important story of the day, was the conclusion of the Andrei Arshavin to Arsenal Saga.

It has dragged on for so long! But finally two days after the window had shut (to presumably stop the snow getting in), Andrei Arshavin became the new No.23 for Arsenal. Final confirmation of the move was held up while the Premier League assessed whether all the necessary paperwork had been completed before the deadline. So now fame and fortune beckons for Mr. Arshavin, perhaps he'll get a spot on a popular tv show.. like Law and Order?:




this is real :)

Dave

Deadline day? Dead boring day more like/ Snow Day Lament

Thomas: Transfer Deadline Day. A day that begins in vain hope and inevitably ends in a flurry of tears and broken dreams. Nothing ever seems to happen. All the good signings get announced the next morning usually so there's no point in following the latest updates. And yet I do. Like a hawk. Like a hawk waiting for that tasty tasty field mouse to pop out of its house for the weekly grocery shop. But, inevitably, it's never worth it because any mouse that only leaves its house once a week won't be a very tasty meat. And that's what deadline day is. A stringy and disappointingly chewy anti-climax.

Dave: At least it's snowing.

Thomas: At least it's snowing? At least it's snowing!?!? I had to walk in that blizzard today, not fun. Imagine being attacked by a maniac with a giant fan and lots of freezing cold papier-mache. That's what it was like.

Dave: *tear* :-| It's snow, did you not expect it to be cold??!! It's the bitter sweet beauty of this amazing geographical phenomenon, that's so rarely seen, in Scotland at least, during these times of Global Warming. I had lots of fun today, although I didn't make a snowman... go sledging... or have a proper snowball fight... :-S. Still it was nice to look at, and there's always that little voice in your head that says:

"The school might have to shut early! You might get sent home!! There might be no school tomorrow!!"

We even got a tannoy just before the end of the afternoon (just to raise our hopes a little more), that informed us that "The School is going to close..." You could almost hear the collective intake of breath around the school before "...at 6pm this evening due to adverse weather, so there will be no extra-curricular activities tonight and the A.G.M. has been cancelled".

The air of disbelief hung over us for a few seconds... "An A.G.M! Oh no!" commented some witty pupil, before we banished that small, hopeful voice from our minds and sank once again back to the drudgery of education.

And as the bell pulsed its 6 lifeless tones that would normally lift my spirits as an evening of freedom approached, I felt hollow, almost cheated as I packed away my things and stared out at the blizzard that would not close our 'beloved halls of learning'. Sigh.

Pausing only to throw an anonymous snowball in the direction of our Headteacher, I pulled my scarf tighter and walked away into the white..

'S no joke.

Thomas: Whilst he had great fun at school, frolicking around in the snow in his free periods, as you do as a "young adult", I have been bed-ridden for most of the day, ill with the flu, rousing only to follow Dead-in-the-Water Deadline day and to make a painful trip to the orthodontist. I can scarcely believe it. Flu and snow. On the same day. Just not fair. And I have an exam tomorrow! The world is against me. Either that or it's just bad luck. But "the world is against me" has more of a ring to it, you know?

I should mention that me and Dave don't go to the same school, he lives up in the wilderness somewhere up north or whatever, I live in a civilised place called my house (which is in Edinburgh).

And don't worry, my exam doesn't matter because I have an unconditional offer for uni, which means I don't have to work this year. At all. But I try not to rub it in. That I have an unconditional. To the uni of my choice. An unconditional. An uncon-
You get the picture.

Dave: On the subject of unconditionals... I have 4 :)
This has been the first of our collaborative posts which I hope you'll enjoy... well my bits anyway!

Thomas and Dave